Special Buchou
by Hopeless27
Summary: “Sometimes oresama marvels at why oresama was born with such chiselled good looks and natural intellectual superiority” Yep, Atobe is PERFECTLY modest. Yay, Chapter 2 is up!
1. Chapter 1

**Rated:**** K+**

**Summary**** "Sometimes ore-sama marvels at why ore-sama was born with such chiselled good looks and natural intellectual superiority"**

**Pairings:****none?**

**Category: ****humour**

**Characters:**** Hyoutei**

**Disclaimer:**** If I owned PoT… I would… oh whatever … I just don't.**

* * *

_Not necessarily a part of this but still Hyoutei:_

_**Hyotei Phobia**_

_**Hyotei Library Session**_

_**Bets and Lovers**_

_**Book of Stupidity**_

_**Fights and Idiots**_

_**Switching Places**_

_**Book of Stupidity 2**_

_**Melting Ice**_

_**Lost in Tennis**_

_**Of Cameras and Attention**_

_**Street Tennis**_

_**Ore-sama's journal**_

_**Advice from Jirou**_

_**The Park and the Church**_

_**The Accident**_

_**Unhappy Information**_

_**Hospital Food**_

_**Help from Jirou**_

_**Reconcile and Resolve**_

_**Atobeism**_

_**Getting Out**_

_**Catching up aka BOS3**_

_**Daycare and Librarians**_

* * *

Atobe smirked and cast a look around the Hyoutei tennis club. 

"Uh-oh, he's gonna make a speech again…" Mukahi got out earplugs.

"Let's just hope it's short." Shishido smacked his forehead and Ohtori crossed himself.

Oshitari just smirked and Hiyoshi mumbled, "Jirou-senpai is so lucky…" as he glared at the sleeping Jirou.

Thus, Atobe started, "Some people have been questioning my authority for the past few days," Atobe glared at Mukahi, "so ore-sama has written a speech for these people…"

"What's so good about you anyways?" Mukahi muttered.

Atobe shot a fiery glare at Mukahi and threw away his piece of paper, "Everyone believes that ore-sama is an ideal role model. Sometimes ore-sama marvels at why ore-sama was born with such chiselled good looks and natural intellectual superiority. Ore-sama's flawless personality and engaging charisma are so strong, that at times I feel like people shadow ore-sama's every move in hopes of becoming more like me. Ore-sama's huge capacity to give has inspired society and the world in general to become a better place. My power to boost another's self esteem (even when I'm lying) is almost unearthly in efficiency. Ore-sama would do this because ore-sama is a good role model and good role models always improve civilization. The Prime Minister will make speeches about ore-sama's numerous services to under-developed nations and cure for AIDs. Fans will shower me with undying worship and Baz Luhrmann will create a Broadway musical starring me. Green isn't a good colour on you, so don't be too jealous. Ore-sama was just fortunate enough to have a good gene pool that bestowed ore-sama with a sixth sense and a huge palette of paranormal powers."

"Uh…" Was the only thing that was heard around the silent courts.

At that precise moment, Jirou woke up and asked yawningly, "Who's Baz Luhrmann?"

Mukahi took out his earplugs and stared at Jirou, incredulous, "Don't tell me you were actually listening…"

"Z…z…z"

"Nevermind…"

* * *

**_A/N : _**_Lolz, this is a Morning Affirmation from my school newspaper, revised and edited to suit Atobe-sama more. Yeah it's really REALLY suited to him, ne? Oh and D and L is currently on a short hiatus... i'm getting lazy. There's another morning affirmation i can use and if i get more, i'll make this ongoing-ish. (Wahh, i get my report card tomorrow:'()_

_**E/N: **Why did you write this again...? Meh...anyways...this is really random...and i DON'T think that it's got anything to do with Anti's little "series"...but that okay...review!!_

_**Hate it, love it? Tell me what you think!**  
_


	2. Chapter 2

**Rated:**** K+**

**Summary**** "Ore-sama is just about the least egotistical person there is…"**

**Pairings:****none?**

**Category: ****humour**

**Characters:**** Hyoutei**

**Disclaimer:**** If I owned PoT… I would… oh whatever … I just don't.**

* * *

"Ne Yuushi!" Mukahi crawled up to Oshitari.

"What is it, Gakuto?" Oshitari asked, putting the book he was reading away.

"Let's play the 'it is' game!" Mukahi declared.

"Did you just make that game up?" Atobe asked, from the other side of the change room.

"Well, kind of," Mukahi grinned, "But never mind that, I'll say whoever is… and you say the first word that comes to mind."

"No," Oshitari said simply.

"Aw, why not?" Mukahi pouted.

"Because it's stupid!" Shishido called.

"It's not stupid, I'm bored!" Mukahi called back, "If you don't play it, I'll cry!"

"Why do you always drag me into this?" Oshitari asked.

"Because I love you?" Mukahi guessed.

"Ugh…"

"Okay, Shishido is…"

"A dash-specialist."

"Ohtori is…"

"Nice…"

"Tezuka is…"

"A wall…"

"Fuji is…"

"Pretty…"

"HEY! WHAT WAS THAT?" Mukahi screamed, hitting Oshitari on the head.

"What?"

"You said that Seigaku tensai was pretty!"

"…It was the first thing that came to mind…"

"Prettier than me?" Mukahi asked.

"The world is prettier than you!" Shishido yelled from across the room.

"SHUT UP NO ONE ASKED YOU!"

"No, he's not prettier than you," Oshitari said without a hint of emotion, "Now please continue."

"Echizen is…"

"A brat…"

"Sanada is…"

"A rock…"

"Yukimura is…"

"Feminine…"

"Atobe is…"

"Egotistical," Oshitari said automatically.

"Ore-sama is NOT egotistical!"

This was followed by a large round of coughing…

"I'll have you know that Ore-sama is the least egotistical person there is!" Atobe continued.

"Oh no, he's gonna make one of his speeches again."

"Even on totally dreadful days, Ore-sama always manages to compliment people on their appearance or personality, even when the mission is virtually impossible." Atobe paused to look at Mukahi, "Ore-sama realize that my own naturally luminous tresses and acute fashion sense intimidates Ore-sama's friends" All the other regulars tried not to strangle their buchou at this point, "So Ore-sama always manages to dress down in order to improve their self confidence in their dreary appearance. Ore-sama doesn't do these kind gestures out of pity or obligation, but because Ore-sama is innately charitable to others and feel personally responsible for their wellbeing. I have earned great respect from followers who prophesize that when Ore-sama grows up Ore-sama's self-sacrificing nature will regain equality and rid prejudice from society. Ore-sama's services for mankind will be recreated through the magic of cinema and syndicated on free websites like You Tube in honour of Ore-sama's low tolerance for overpriced blockbusters that deprived peasants can't afford. Therefore Ore-sama is just about the least egotistical person there is..."

The rest of the regulars just stared at him for a few minutes in amazement. Who knew that a person could lie so much in one paragraph. This could set a new world record for the biggest liar on earth.

"Anyways…" Mukahi rolled his eyes, "Jirou is…"

"Narcoleptic…"

"Hiyoshi is…"

"Anti-social…"

"Kabaji is…"

"Quiescent…"

"What's that?"

"…just continue…"

"WERE YOU EVEN LISTENING?" Atobe shouted.

"No," The whole team answered simultaneously.

"I hate you all…"

* * *

_**A/N:**__ I got bored and wrote this in half and hour… or less. It's kinda random and rambly… Once again, the speech is taken from my school newspaper, revised and edited by, yours truly, moi… and Ica… but mainly moi… Ica just edited the thing… Oh and Daycare and Librarians is like… dead… I can't think of any good ideas for it and Ica here won't help so… blame it on her._

_**E/N: **__So it's MY fault that your brain is practically DEAD? Sure...and yeah...I edited it. FLAME ANGELA ABOUT ANY MISTAKES!! Blame it on HER since she says that I'm not doing anything. HAVE FUN!!! DON'T REVIEW!!!! (__**Anti: **__Thanks Ica, thanks)_

_**Hopeless27 (aka A/N): **__OH and __**I might**__** NOT**__** be posting anything for a**__**while**__ because I'm currently writing a historical AU fic… and I might post it on a side account I have (I'll call it A-chan here…)… then again, I might not post it at all…(STILL haven't decided). It's all these technicalities about that time period that'll piss me off, and it's one of my mere whims so if I post it here, I'll have a bit of an obligation to finish it and I might not. Anyways, so while I'm amusing myself with that, I'll be kinda… dead… here… unless I feel like drabbles._


End file.
